Friday 30 November 2012

a Story of a Pack of Tissue...

today I went through a long journey *eaaa from Kuningan to Depok acompany my friend to her campus to take her Diploma Certificate. nope, Im not telling you about the journey, but I will tell you about what happen during the journey. 

we arrived at UI Train Station and wait for the free shuttle bus to go to Politeknik Negeri Jakarta. while waiting for the bus, we sit and talk all the times *yeah we love talking so much* until this one old man come near to us. yes, he was an old man walking with his stick to ensure he can still walking. he walked really slow. do you what he brought with him? a huge bag full of tissue packs. he was selling tissue, and offered that to everyone who sitting at the bus station. 

he came near to my seat and I bought his tissue. for your information, I already have a pack of tissue in my bag, as usual. I cant go anywhere without tissue. hhe but why I bought that? I cant explain the feeling. it came so naturally, and I just intended to help him. he reminded me of my father. I bought the tissue and asked him to keep the change for the money I paid. I bought that and he smiled to me.

he continue to his walk to the empty seat not far from me. I can still see him. he sat down, put his stick and tissue bag beside, and hold the money I paid to buy the tissue. he looked at it for quite a long time. and suddenly he wiped his eyes. he cried. it maybe a grateful tears from him. and my tears drop too. it taught me about a lot of things. 

I did not talked to him. I dont how does it feels to walk his way. I dont know how he survive till today. I dont know how many people he needs to support. I know nothing about the old man. but he already became a very important role in my life. he taught me something that I never thought that I will learn today. he taught me on how to be grateful.

for everything I have, why should I ever complain? for the food I eat, for the comfort in life, for a great life opportunity, why should I ever complain? I should have stop myself from always looking to the top, only looking up. I should have start to look beside me, left and right and the most important thing is under me. I may not be the super best perfect person, and Im not even trying to be one. but Im just trying to be a better Icha who is grateful for her life, and absolutely with a better attitude. 

I hope anyone who always use the UI bus/train station will help the old man to continue his life. I did a small step, a very small step to help him when I met him, and you might do a bigger effort soon. not only the old man, but also the little kids who are selling sweets and mineral water to the people there. and also to all of the unfortunate all over the places. we might eat 'nasi telor' for our lunch, but they might have nothing for their lunch. we might complain on how hot the weather is and use air conditioner, but they might not even have any proper place to live. 

sharing is caring, and it leads to a better environment. Im not famous social activist like those you can see their tweets promoting events to help. Im just a simple Icha, who just realize that Im sharing my whole life with others. I care, how about you? 

-Icha-

Cinta Tak Mungkin Berhenti~

Tak ada kisah tentang cinta
Yang bisa terhindar dari air mata
Namun ku coba menerima, hatiku membuka
Siap untuk terluka

Cinta tak mungkin berhenti secepat saat aku jatuh hati
Jatuhkan hatiku kepadamu sehingga hidupku pun berarti
Cinta tak mudah berganti, tak mudah berganti jadi benci 
Walau kini aku harus pergi tuk sembuhkan hati

Walau seharusnya bisa saja dulu aku menghindar
Dari pahitnya cinta
Namun ku pilih begini, biar ku terima
Sakit demi jalani cinta (cinta)

Cinta tak mungkin berhenti secepat saat aku jatuh hati
Jatuhkan hatiku kepadamu sehingga (sehingga) hidupku (hidupku) pun berarti
Cinta tak mudah berganti, tak mudah berganti jadi benci
Walau kini aku harus pergi tuk sembuhkan hati

Hanya kamu yang bisa (…)
Bisa membuatku rela (rela menjalani segalanya)
Rela menangis karenamu (ku rela ku rela …)

Cinta tak mungkin berhenti secepat saat aku jatuh hati
Jatuhkan hatiku kepadamu sehingga hidupku pun berarti
Cinta tak mudah berganti (cinta tak mungkin berhenti)
Tak mudah berganti jadi benci (tak mudah untuk berganti)
Walau kini aku harus pergi tuk sembuhkan hati
Biar ku pergi sembuhkan hati


-Tangga- 



Sunday 18 November 2012

Sincerely, Icha~



Assalamualaikum….


Dear you,


Its been so long that I haven’t write something nice between us. Yeah, I do apologize for being so childish all these times. And I do deeply apologize for disturbing your life with my stupid demands…


You know what, I am getting better now. So much better. I think my extreme decision I took last week actually does work out. And I don’t think you should know what was the action I have taken. Let me keep by myself. I hope you’re getting better too. Much better without me. I wish nothing, but everything the best for you, dear.


This one might be the last letter for you. I do hope so, because everything is over. There is no more ‘US’ but there is only you and I. we’re two different individuals, which for the time being, just unlucky enough to be together. God might have fated this. I do know that our life story already written and maybe this one also already stated. We’re not meant to be together. And I, I am learning to accept the fact. It’s hurt. A lot. But life must go on. 


For me, you presence in my life is a lesson in blessings. God sent you to bring out a better me. Yes, I might not be that better now in everyone’s perception. But after you’re gone, I know I have to do something regarding myself. A huge homework God left for me through you to be finished. It’s not changes actually, to be more specific, I called it betterment. Betterment in everything I do. Betterment in my own life.


I am thankful to met you. Out of billions human in this planet, I did found someone who once accept me as who I am. Who once loves me with all his heart. Who once will ever do anything for me. Yes, I am lucky enough to ever had you in my life. You had become a part of my soul. You made my life turns into colors. You taught me a lot about life, to see things from many angle. And I, have learn a lot from you. Thank you, my ‘Guru Hidup’.


In this last letter for you, I just want to say thank you. Thank you for standing by my side all these times. Thank you for making me laughs with your silly jokes and stories. Thank you for wipe my tears. Thank you for the understandings. Thank you for the all phone calls and sms that really made my day. Thank you for the affections and loves. Thank you for all of the time we ever had to meet. You did too much of good things, I just can’t explain it one by one. But the thing is, I am thankful to ever had you in my life. 


Now I am learning the fact that we’re no longer together. Being a single me back is hard. Maybe its hard for you too. But we ever had this before right? Why should worry right? It’s no easy to wake up in the morning knowing that someone ever love you is no longer there. It hurt so deep when I heard you said there is no more love for me. But I realize, ever choice has its own consequences. I believe now I have to accept it and learn from it. 


I am in a learning process. A life after you still needs to go through, no matter what the condition is. Since you left, I am trying to build myself. Picking up those broken pieces of heart are hard, but I will try. I am fixing myself now. Regarding everything. About me, my life, my surroundings and you. I just need your prayers. For me to be strong enough to go through all these. 


I hope you’re fixing your heart too. I am sorry for letting it broken once again. I am really sorry for repeating the same bad experience you ever had. I never meant to do it. Never. I will always pray for your happiness, like I always do. 


For both of us, I hope one day we’ll meet someone who will be our life partner, forever. We might be and might not be together. Thus, I just hope the best for us. I hope we can meet someone who completes us. I am not asking for a perfect person, but I just hope someone who will accept me for who I am and be my Imam and guide me. I hope you will also find someone who will completes you perfectly, be her Imam and guide her through God’s way. I will always pray for you and I. I also hope you will not forget about me. Because I won’t forget anything about you. 


Sincerely,

Icha

Thursday 15 November 2012

a Story From Balikpapan...

Assalamualaikum and hello my dearest blogworld! :)

Ive been working and staying here, in Balikpapan for a month and overall, its all good. except the food. meeeh -__- alright, stop complaining and lets be thankful of what I have. yeaaah! :D

Firstly, I wanna share about the house Ive been living for the whole month. the housing complex is Kuala Batakan Cottage (KBC) and its located in Batakan, Balikpapan Timur. my house no is 31 and this house the located in front of the beach. but unfortunately, the beach is not as pretty as the one in Bali. hahaha but you can still see the blue sea from this house and if you wake early, you are lucky enough to watch the sunrise. its super beautiful! :D

The house is super big, its a bungalow actually. and Im totally sure that this house is for family to stay, not a single person like me. -___- it consist of 4 bedrooms, huge living room with comfort sofa and wide flat screen tv, plus cable channel. haha :P the household items here are complete, they have rice cooker, refrigerator, microwave, oven, washing machine and etc. yeah. too good to stay here. hihihi :D but unfortunately, my time has come to say goodbye to my lovely KBC no 31 because I have to move out and will be permanently stay in my rented room at the town. whatever it is, I love staying here, except being lonely part. I kinda dislike it. >____<

Secondly, I wanna share about my office. yeah, Im sure you already know where Im working right? haha *GeEr* :P right, Im now working with Schlumberger, where my segment is under PT Dowell Anadrill Schlumberger that is focusing on Well Services activities. my office is located in Manggar and we dont really call it as office, but we call it Manggar Base. hoho :D Manggar Base cover Kalimantan Operations but we do have certain jobs in Acheh. weird? its all because we won the tender and now I know Im lucky enough to be assigned here. :))

in Manggar Base, all of the Schlumberger segments are under one roof. yup, unlike Prabumulih. -,- thus, its totally a huge base and soooooooo many people here! and everyday you get the chance to meet new people, especially the foreigners. they are all nice. and all of the door only can be accessed by using PKI and mine is not yet ready, so until now Im still using the temporary employee PKI. -__- my office and lab is located at the second floor and at the back of the base. yeah, kinda far far away from other people. -,- currently, I not yet have my own desk due to minimum space at the office and for a new comer, I should have wait for about 3 months for my own working desk and computer. thus, Im now using seniors desktop because they're sent to the location and some is assigned for a different shift with me. #NasibAnakBaru 

my working life actually brings me to a new side of the world. because you're selling yourself here. to let yourself being appreciated, you should make yourself valuable. and here I learn to face the real competition. there is no more individual that can become 'penjilat' to the boss like my campus life. everything here is done professionally. everything needs to be evaluated. my career is being viewed by my manager from time to time. Schlumberger have all of the programs that will ensure that everyone deserve what they deserve. if you're good enough, they will reward you. and I do feel this. its a good place to learn and develop myself. 

apart from that, I also learn how to be a better person. its a normal surrounding where you can see some people are not liking other people. and they keep on telling you about that other person bad attitude. I took that positively. as a reminder to myself. I believe that particular person also talking about me behind me too. haha so, firstly, never talk about other people behind their back if you refuse to accept the same treatment. secondly, if anyone tells you anything about other person, keep it by yourself. dont let go everywhere. because thirdly, never creates problem! yeah, I always kept in mind all those reminders. I wanna have a better life here and will be a better person too. hhe :D 

yeah, that's all the story from Balikpapan. I wish I could have more better stories to be shared with you later. have a good night, my blogworld! :D


my lovely room in KBC no 31 :)


the living room, simple and comfy :)


Sunday 11 November 2012

hey, it's ME!

Hey, its me!

People call me Icha

And I refused to be called Lisa

Im 22

and so bad to be true

I like books,

Sometimes I cook

I love singing

But too bad in dancing

Im far from pretty face

Im far from good attitude

I have almost everything

But I just lost something

For sure, I know this is my new beginning...



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Saturday 10 November 2012

Hello, Real World!

Assalamualaikum and hello my blogworld! :)

its been almost 3 weeks since Im officially working. yup, Im earning money on my own for living and obviously its for my family and future too. hhe :D

I call this working environment as a real life. the competition is bigger and you'll have to fight till your last breath to survive *pencitraan* hahhaha :P but yeah, here is where everything started. Im meeting a whole new people. every unique individuals who were fated to be in The Blue, from various background. Im having managers from Malaysia and Mexico. having coleague from Japan, Taiwan, China, USA and many more. and mostly Sundanese and Javanese are my friends here. haha its a good environment and I hope I can develop myself here. Aamiin :)

3 weeks and I have gained so much experiences. I gotta the chance to learn about things I never thought that I gonna involve with before. oil & gas world, are you kidding me? haha anyway, its real, Im now a part of the Schlumberger Well Services Cementing Lab Team #proud :D we're working with Cementing job designs. the simulation of real cementing job at location. we're not merely mixing, testing and reporting but also designing the cement slurry itself. at first, it was the job of the Field Engineers, but then, once their designs are not suitable with the real situation, we have to do the modification. 

and for sure, all of the process in the lab are not easy and usual. I have to learn from the theory modules for the working principle of the machines, learning the correct technique when doing the tests, learning the correct way to set up the machine and all the small things that's needed for the test. and not to forget on how to program the machine using computer. everything might looks simple. even I thought so. but a very small mistake will brings out fatality result. not only the tests failed, but also it will not satisfy the customer. because the rigs are rented using hours. means, the pay for example 1million USD for an hour. if we do the mistakes, yeah, it will not be a good sign for our company. and I hope I wont do that. Aamiin :D

by the way, this company also gave me the chance to have a new experience for Helicopter Underwater Escape Training & Basis Sea Survival training session. it was....... a speechless experience because I thought Im gonna die in the water during the escape training. T_____T it was super duper scary because I cant swim and dont have a spesific ability on breathing control in the water. I got nose bleed for and unknown reason, maybe because of pressure. I got cold because be in the water for half of the day. and Alhamdulillah Im still alive and still breathing till today. *fiuh*

overall, working here is a so much fun new learning experience. a fresh graduate like me, and this multi national company, its not a dream come true but its a reality that is fated for me. I never dreamed for this, but Allah is too nice for me. Thank You, Allah :D

My HUET ID and can be used for 3 years all over Indonesia Ocean :)

Friday 9 November 2012

its all about TIME

"time will heal"

I dont know whether its true or not, but maybe that's the only answer for all of my prayers.

Im sitting at the corner of the room. Crying all night long. Yes, nothing is fine for me now.

I hope time will stop my tears.

I hope time will cure my heart.

I hope time will remove the empty spaces in it.

I hope time will make me a better person.

I hope time will make everything gonna be alright.

I hope to be happy. With or without you.....

-Malisa Sudirman-

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Thursday 8 November 2012

Kosong

Kosong. Empty. Nol. Zero. Hopeless.

That's represent my heart now.

Im suck. I know.

Im bad. I know.


Im stupid. I know.


Im demanding. I know.


Im not thankful. I know.


I love you? I dont know.

You dont love me? Yes I know.


Why you are not loving me anymore?

Why you left lot of empty spaces in my heart when you left?


Why you let it having a hole inside there?


Why dont you just kill me?

Dont you know that everything inside me are dying.


Im a dead soul.


Yes I am



-Beast-


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