Lets Talk : Self Confidence

''The way to develop self-confidence is to do the thing you fear and get a record of successful experiences behind you''

William Jennings Bryan

I still remember when I was a little child, it was exactly when I was in kindergarten, my teacher asked me to do a poetry recital during the Teacher’s Day. It was my first time standing in front of the public, reciting a poem specially dedicated for my teachers. I don’t know where I got the bravery to stand up there, but all I know, it was the beginning of me building myself confidence. 

I am the first child, born in a average family. My mother did not take any formal education due to her family life was really under poverty back then. My father did not finish his primary school because he has to work to earn money so that he could help his parents. My family background somehow, at the beginning, made me feel so low esteem. I don’t think I could do better compare to my friends, because I don’t know, maybe just because I cannot afford things they have. 

But then, I realize one thing, that to be successful money and wealth is not a guarantee. I was inspired by those high achievers who have a under privilege background but really succeed in their future life. Starting from there, I have to build this one thing that I don’t have. it started when I was in primary school in Malaysia. Being an Indonesian born student in a national Malay school, I always get bullied by my friends. They always mocked me with harsh words. They even called me ‘Indon’, really inappropriate to call us, Indonesians. 

At that time, I have to do something. To reach something that would let me stands out. At least I could gain respect from my schoolmates who always underestimate me. I don’t know how, but standing in front of the school every Monday for the morning ceremony will always bring a good feeling for me. Step by step, I achieved a lot more things. It’s not only at the school environment that I perform in front of public just to do public speaking and poetry recital, but also inter-school competition. It’s getting more and more as the years goes by. 

How I gain the confidence to speak in front of hundreds, even thousands of audience? It’s not because of I want to gain popularity at my school. Popularity is just a bonus. Even I am not popular at all. hahahaha. And also, it wasn’t because I want to be respected by my friends who always bullied me. it’s all because of my parents. I want them to feel proud of me, of things they have taught me that could bring a lot of positive achievements in my life. I know that my parents never had the chance to have all these, and that’s why I am doing it for them. 

Everytime Im going to do something, I do have worry. Worry if I cannot make it, worry if Im not good at it, worry if I only will make people laughing at me. And this feelings, come everytime I want to try something new. Things I never thought that I could make it. But then, if I started to think of my parents, how they will smile looking at me successfully achieve something, I put my very best efforts to it. I don’t really care about result, because the most important thing is Im trying my best and let Allah do the rest.

Apart from that, I also love to do something that will break my boundaries, out of my comfort zone. It’s far more challenging than doing things you are used to it, because it’s different, it’s new and I believe it will reflects me in a very different point of view. Yes, I agree that not everyone can do everything. But then, it could be better if everyone have the guts just to try things out of their norm. In my opinion, life do needs colours and one of the way to create the colour is by having various of things to try on. This is how I define my own self confidence. 

All of us, are unique creature created by Allah and have our own potential in a lot of things. If you’re good at one thing, just go and have a shot to it. Make it big. Just ignore those who underestimate you. Because if they’re too busy doing that, it means you’re one step ahead of them and they’re also dreaming to do what you’re doing. Always think positively. You’re beautiful no matter what skin colour you have. You are smart no matter what scores you achieve in exam. You’re talented with your special ability. And lastly, you’re gifted, your life in this earth is to bring something good, let’s spread a good thing around you. Be confidence in whatever you do! ^__^

Opening Speech for IDEA Debate 2010 :)